A young child who lives in the house or visits every day does not stop being a child because someone is dying in the next room. The sickroom has to fit that child as well as the bed, the chair, and the equipment. Most of the trouble comes from things that were sized for an adult and never checked against a small person who moves fast and is curious.
Measure from the floor, not from your height
Walk the sickroom and the route to the bathroom on your knees or crouched down. Look at what a child at that height can reach: outlet covers, electrical cords, the bottom shelf of any cabinet, the edge of a bedside table, the gaps along a bed rail, and the handle of a window or door. Check each cord run from the wall to the bed. A cord that is out of reach for a standing adult may be exactly at a child's grab height.
Local option: New Plan Care gives families in the St. Louis area in-home help so a parent can stay home: companionship, help with bathing and dressing, meals, and overnight care. Call (314) 405-0887.
Decide where the child is while you are at the bedside
Before any equipment arrives, name the room the child will be in during the hours you are at the bedside. It should have a door that closes, a latch the child cannot work, and a path that does not cross the sickroom. If the child will be on the far side of a gate, measure the opening at its narrowest point and confirm the gate fits it and fastens without a tool a child could find.
What to check, and who checks it
Write a short list of what you measured and what you changed: the height of each outlet and cord, the gap at the bed rail, the latch on the door, the highest shelf a child can climb onto, and any corner at the height of a child's head. Put a name next to each line. The list is not finished until someone who lives in the house has walked it with you and agreed on the result.
Questions to settle before you size anything
Ask who will watch the child during the day and who takes over when the adult caregiver steps out of the room. Ask whether the child will be allowed into the sickroom at all, and what the family has agreed about visits near the bed. Ask whether school, a neighbor, or a relative changes the number of hours the child is in the house. Those answers decide the room more than the tape measure does.
What stays with the family
Keep the patient's medicines and any supplies used for care in a place the child cannot reach, and do not give that storage job to a hired helper. Ask the hospice team and the pharmacist which items they want kept where. This guide cannot tell you what is safe for a particular child, and those two people can.
When the room is still too small
If the room cannot keep the child clear of the bed and the equipment, a bigger room is not always the answer. It may be a different time of day for the child to be in the house, a neighbor who takes the child for part of the day, or a second adult who stays in the other room. For people who can help in your area, start with Local Help for Hospice Families.